I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Randomize
