he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
