it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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