My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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