So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Randomize