That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
We have started to decorate penises.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Randomize
