I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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