Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Randomize