your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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