once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
