How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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