Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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