Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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