Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Randomize
