Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
