Bisexual people are plain selfish.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Randomize
