dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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