you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
