are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
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