your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
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