jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Randomize
