was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Randomize