38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize