why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Randomize