Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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