Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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