That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Randomize
