batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize