WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
You ever have a fart follow you around?
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