roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
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