he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
