When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
