still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Randomize
