did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Randomize
