and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
