i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Randomize
