Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
BRING THE BAGELS
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
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