their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
