So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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