It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I stole a fireplace last night.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I have tasted many bathrooms
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
