i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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