I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
he told me I talked like a deaf person
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Randomize