u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
My breasts were aching with rage.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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