Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
