wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
