If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Randomize
