Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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