I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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