I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
