that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
