Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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