That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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