Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
