I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
